Looking back to this time last year, I've been thinking about the whole pregnancy and childbirth thing. I keep reading blogs from other people who are having babies in the near future and I find myself wondering if there are things I'd want to do differently if I had it to do all over. Like...
Thursday, December 10, 2015
Monday, November 23, 2015
With a grateful prayer and a thankful heart
I guess the title of this post is somewhat ironic, since I'm going to be writing about how hard it is for me to be thankful this time of year. This year, in particular, it's rough. But it seems like the holidays bring a heaping dose of bullshit pretty much every single year. There's...
Friday, November 20, 2015
Balance - Is there such a thing?
Lately I've been struggling with balance. I have these weird hangups about things. Like, I love my daughter and I want to spend time with her, but I also am faced with a million other things that need to be done all the time. I'm not one of those mom's who is like "Oh, the house is...
Tuesday, October 20, 2015
Working Mom Struggles, and How Not To Relate
So, at the risk of sounding like one of those "It's so hard for a working mom" whiners, I have to say that being a working mom can sometimes suck. After I went back to work I had a really hard time the first few weeks because I felt like I had just started to get good at being a mom and then I...
Friday, October 2, 2015
Drifting
One of the things that sucks about becoming a parent for the first time is trying not to let your brain go to bad places when patterns start to emerge. When you spend less time with friends you start to think "Is that because they don't want to be around me because of the kid?" and even if that...
Wednesday, September 16, 2015
Craving Connection
It's been a while. Mostly because my free blogging time has been not-so-free lately, and also because I've been in this space of having too much to say and not enough energy to get it all out. Even now, sitting here attempting to write this, I find myself exhausted at the idea of having...
Thursday, July 2, 2015
Functional Exhaustion
Everyone tells you that you'll be exhausted when you have a newborn. They talk about interrupted sleep and nights of no sleep at all, and you sort of get to mentally prepare yourself for that. It was pretty hard for me because my daughter would wake up to eat every two hours, which meant...
Tuesday, June 30, 2015
Monster Kisses
Sometimes I'm surprised by how much my daughter notices, particularly when I think about how she's only 6 months old. She knows favorite songs and gets more excited when we sing some than others. She likes specific toys. She recognizes people when she sees them. The other day...
Tuesday, June 23, 2015
The Milestone Path
It's been a while, and there are so many topics I want to write about. Everything from the politics of parenting, to observations of other people and their children, to emotional terrorism, and a variety of other things. Look for those in future, I suppose. Today, though, today I want...
Monday, May 18, 2015
A bit of truth
If I'm being honest, I love my daughter. I love her probably more than I let on to others. I love her gummy smile and the fact that most of her face is dominated by these huge beautiful eyes that spend all of their time taking in everything around her. I love that she's a little pig...
Friday, May 15, 2015
Inside my head
It's funny sometimes how things will hit you out of the blue. Weird things that you don't think about until something strange triggers your trip down the rabbit hole of your own thoughts and then things crash on you like a ton of bricks. The other night I found myself crying in the shower....
Thursday, May 14, 2015
Thoughts on Mother's Day
Mother's Day was this past Sunday. Mother's Day is bittersweet for me for a number of reasons. Firstly, because I've always had a pretty rocky relationship with my own mom. It used to weigh on me a lot. I used to feel like there was something wrong with me that my mother couldn't...
Friday, May 8, 2015
On pregnancy and the aftermath
I stumbled across a blog today that someone wrote about women being pregnant and how they felt about their body both during and after pregnancy, and as I read it I just kept thinking "Well, fuck those guys". Here's the thing, they all had some big long commentary about being in awe of how their...
Monday, May 4, 2015
Sometimes I struggle
I've been having a rough few weeks on an internal emotional turmoil level. There are a lot of contributing factors, but for some reason today I just find myself trying not to cry while sitting here at work. I thought maybe if I wrote some things out, it might help. Hard to say.
1....
Thursday, April 16, 2015
Oy with the acid reflux!
This past week in adventures in parenting, my daughter started freaking out when we'd feed her. She'd get through about 2 ounces of her bottle and then totally melt down. She wouldn't take more formula, and she'd just squirm and cry. On top of that, she started spitting up more than...
Monday, April 13, 2015
Then again, maybe not
This weekend we decided to venture out on our first mall trip. My husband needed new work shoes, and I just needed to get out of the house. We hadn't taken my daughter out to the mall yet. She had gone to the grocery store a number of times, but those are quick 20 minute trips. Nothing...
Saturday, April 11, 2015
Little girls do something to people
I'm not sure what it is about little girls, but they seem to do something to people. I've been contrasting the reaction to my daughter against the way people talk about and react to my nephew, and it's a striking contrast. People dote on my daughter. They coo over her, they delight...
Tuesday, April 7, 2015
Adventures of a Part Time Single Mom
My husband takes class two nights a week and on Saturday mornings, which leaves me solo on baby duty a few days a week. It also means that I'm responsible for making sure dinner gets made for the family while also juggling an often cranky infant. Then on nights when he doesn't have class,...
Friday, April 3, 2015
In which I am, again, not typical
My daughter is three months old today, which feels like some sort of milestone but not really a milestone at all. She's doing great, and she seems ahead of the curve on some things. She can sit up in a Bumbo chair already, though you have to prop her up with blankets in the chair because...
Tuesday, March 31, 2015
Play Time
The past couple of weeks have led to my daughter discovering her hands. I thinks he's always known she had them, but now she's realized she can DO THINGS with them. Now she's obsessed with touching and grabbing at stuff. She has a play mat that she lays under and reaches up to grab...
Monday, March 23, 2015
Alert the media
Ok, not actually. No one in the media cares about any of this. I'm trying to be clever. My husband and I were having a conversation over the weekend about our daughter and how alert she usually is. I mean, yes, there are times when she stares over our shoulders and we have zero...
Saturday, March 14, 2015
I don't get it
I don't get it when people say that you can't do anything when you have a baby. I don't get it when people talk about how your house will be a disaster and you will be enjoying many nights of having cereal for dinner because there's no way you could cook with an infant around, or when people say...
