Monday, February 13, 2017

A wealth of useless information

I was talking to a co-worker the other day about the things that worry her about becoming a parent, largely whether the balance of responsibilities will tilt too far to one side.  She said something about how she doesn't want to be the one who has to remember everything all the time.  I told her that once you're on the other side of that parenthood hump, remembering everything isn't really a choice.  It's just a weird habit that you develop and hold onto.  It's this mass of swirling information in your head that doesn't necessarily make sense to anyone else but your brain is holding onto it in case, at some point, you find you need it.  Spoiler alert: A lot of times, you never need it.

That's just how it is, though.  You think about stuff and realize that your own wealth of useless information grows with each passing day, and you can answer the most random questions.  Like, right now, these things can just be pulled from my head:

  • The cat only has one can of cat food left
  • My daughter needs an appointment made for her next checkup
  • My living room's paint color is "Earl Gray"
  • There are no diapers left in the diaper basket, but there's a spare box next to the arm chair
  • There are no diapers upstairs on the changing table
  • The Snurtch book is downstairs in the book basket instead of upstairs in the bookshelf, so if she freaks out that she can't find it, that's where it is.
  • We're out of Swiffer cloths
  • There are three pairs of socks with no matches in my laundry basket
  • The dog only pooped once yesterday, which seems weird.  Must watch to make sure there's not some sort of issue with him.
  • I have half a bottle of dish soap left, which means I'll probably have to buy a new one the week after next.
  • The HOA needs paid, but I want to wait until it's past due because I find the HOA useless and resent paying them so I pay late every year.
  • The Disney Junior book is hidden under my daughter's crib.
  • The Paw Patrol Christmas book is hidden behind the sofa.
  • My husband's phone charger is still sitting on the counter at home, which means his phone will be dead by the time he leaves work.
  • I have to text my friend at 4:30 to follow up on how her interview went.
  • The purple shoes are upstairs under the rocking chair, but the dress shoes are downstairs under the coffee table.
  • There's still a load of laundry in the dryer that needs to be folded.

All of this can be rattled off at a moment's notice.  But can I remember that we already have two containers of parmesan cheese in the fridge?  Nope.  Better buy another....


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